Facebook outlet of personality disorder or releasing bottled up emotions

April 09, 2012

A critic of social networking sites like Facebook, for all these years I had my reasons to feel it is bringing the evil side of human behavioural disorder. Uncontrolled nature of the medium often incites people to use the virtual world as a punching bag, something that many of us need in the real world to vent out anger and frustration. As a result, I often come across cuss words, half-baked perspective and ignorant rant that can spoil the taste of any decent society. More often than not I end up meeting fake faces with a holier-than-thou persona where pseudo identity gets exposed immediately after a meet up in real world. 

No wonder, my initial euphoria of networking with old forgotten acquaintances and newly found like-minded people soon turned out to be taste spoiler. It is not that I stopped adding more friends; rather it remained an on-going process in order to understand the behavioural disorder of the society at large from a psychological perspective. Of course, in this social networking spree, many exposed and not-up-to-the-class crowd got deleted and blocked on a regular basis. Nevertheless I carried on with the necessary evil in social media, though with a critical approach.

However, the writer in me and more importantly the critic in me often had this introspection about the cost-benefit factor of social networking.  After all, sharing of literary taste and socio-political concerns was less and internet hooliganism was more on offer. Every other comment seemed to be coming out of a fit of rage. A subdued society that India has been, there has suddenly been a rush for activism and often “rebel without a cause” in the virtual world. 

Added to the fact, I also found the other side of what I call misguided personality where people seemed to be exploring what they are surely of incapable of achieving in real life. Most conspicuous has been the quest for a political career by viciously abusing the governments and the powers-to-be. Many of such people seem to genuinely believe that it is a platform for transformation and social change.

All this left a very basic question that whether Facebook was proving to be an agent of lawless society. How to deal with an outlet of personality disorder? Whether there is a psychological side of the medium that needed to be thoroughly researched? Whether Facebook is making everyone a communicator for all the wrong reasons? What are the long terms social benefits and imbalances of the virtual world?

However, what made me question my own conviction now, if not change it completely, is some personal experiences where I was introspecting whether my own outburst on the Facebook was in sync with my belief and ideology. Of late, Facebook by default proved to be my alter ego as well where my subconscious mind was driving me to vent out my anger and frustration. But the critic in me was constantly questioning whether this impulsive urge to update my state of mind so bluntly could have been avoided? 

Going through some crisis in life when I needed an avenue to vent my anger, with nobody around, Facebook was there. Of course, my frustration and anger never defied my intellect or literary taste. But then, I ended up doing something of which I have been critic over the years. So, now I have come to realise that in the fast lane of loneliness that the life in a metro offers, Facebook and many other virtual-social platforms are also acting like stress busters. 

In an honest observation, I had bottled up emotion for months that was asking to be released. And before I could regain my intellectual self, the anger, frustration and depression in me got an outlet with Facebook updates. And I must admit here that this release of bottled up emotion had its therapeutic effect as well. Have I ended up doing the same of which I had been a bitter critic? 

I am trying to delve much deeper to understand this dichotomy of social media and shaping up of personality. Hopefully, I come out with some more conclusive results. If not, at least I have initiated a debate which many psychologists would love to discuss—whether Facebook is an outlet for personality disorders or releasing bottled up emotions. Well, till the time more conclusive results are found, Facebook seems to continue as an alter ego for many like me. 

Social netwroking is a blind date that needs precaution

Jan 22, 2010

As if a Facebook status update or a Tweet with bad language, half baked perspective and ignorant rant was not enough. One of the recent relationship invites make me wonder whether social media is the new haven for all the disgruntled souls. I can conveniently ignore the overt advertisements inviting blind dates on various networking sites, but am clueless with some weird, strange quirks that let you into places you aren’t supposed to go. How can one fall in love with me just over couple of days of online friendship? It seems organized criminals are using one’s personal information shared on social networking sites in increasingly sophisticated ways to target victims.
Social media even without these gangs can never be a safe zone in a society where conflict resolution is more about compromising than collaborating. I often come across peculiar thought process that seem to shout at your face- “I don’t like your status updates/tweets anymore, not because your or mine literary tastes or social concerns have suddenly changed. My grouse is more with your snub to the common friend in the network who is more close to me.” All this makes me wonder whether we need a primary school of social networking to remind us that we are grown ups now. It is true that social networking is also about community building. But this close knit bonding for the right reasons often turn into wrong reasons when there is an element of subtle lobbying in the process. 
In a free virtual world with no guidelines or regulations, we are getting used to see something online that makes us mad, find something offensive online repetitively nowadays. Bad language, cuss words, half-baked perspective, ignorant rant and much more that often gets to the nerves to react. Somehow I am learning to live with this reality that very much like the real life; problem with opinion online is that everyone has it. Perhaps even Lord Keene could not anticipate that in days to come everybody will be an expert on everything.
For a person like me with firm grounding in conventional means of communication, the conscious decision to switch to new online vehicles—Twitter, LinkedIn, Facebook was not based on its decency level any way. The experience of close friends over Orkoot was enough to suggest how a networking site can be a catalyst to behavior pattern shift in a virtual world. But then it was a need to take the clients’ presence to the new age tools. Something that Track2Media Consulting has done quite successfully over the last couple of years.
Over a period of time I started realizing the need of this necessary evil called social media, both at a personal and professional level. I have written extensively over the pros and cons of networking over the medium. I also keep telling the students of mass communication, with whom I interact as guest faculty in some institutes and universities that it is a necessary evil. Precaution is a must if you want to play safe. 
Professionally as a brand communication expert and as an activist at personal level, my caustic, sarcastic and angry response is often not in sync with the opportunity cost of ignoring it. I often allow myself to get offended and outraged, and the activist in me just can’t resist giving it back to the offence. Though, of late, I have started questioning myself whether the person has been worth my reaction. Has my reaction only given him credibility? Still by and large I don’t care for the cost-benefit analysis of my reputation in a world where, as they say, those who matter don’t mind and those who mind don’t matter. Social media is big enough for all kinds of characters to stay and engage.
After all, social media is like a blind date. You can only wish that she turns out to be a hot chick. On your part you get your basics right and arrive in style in a blind date. Again you can only hope this date with hot chick doesn’t get goofed up. But if the prayers are not answered, who cares. And who would like to carry the blind date analogy to its logical, ridiculous extreme? If the conversation online is not right, or if the other person carries a placard suggesting he/she is the best, you just communicate for a while and walk your way, without any plans of engaging yourself.
I treat my online relationship in a similar way, and any interaction beyond this is always a slow and steady process. Handling a relationship is fragile and nurturing the respect takes its own time and judgment. It hardly matters if my friends’ list changes completely over a period of time, particularly in the event of failure to agree to disagree. As a matter of principle in my now almost two years of social & professional networking online, I have never asked someone for personal information. I have exchanged phone numbers only when regular online interaction has led to some common meeting grounds and the other person feels like connecting with me at a personal or professional level.
I have also never asked a virtual friend of the opposite sex to show me her real picture as to how she looks like. I have also never removed someone from the friends list just because her real face is not visible on the site. I have rather respected the individual choice of the person to be there online the way she wants to be. Her decision to keep anonymous might be guided by her desire to play safe in a world where photographs of even celebrities are morphed with nude pictures nowadays. Who am I to intrude into someone’s safety zones, just because she added me as a friend? For me these personal details matter if we become close enough to think of meeting outside the virtual zones. But such friendships are few and far between.
In general I am nowadays careful with who my friends are; they could turn out to be my worst enemies. There are some wonderful people whom I have met online and with whom I have interacted and built a relationship. However, there are also other people who misrepresent who they are and what their intentions are. In order to be safe, some of my female friends don’t put their real pix and personal details to be known to all. After all, they need to be constantly cognizant about who they trust and what they divulge online. It is important not to trust online connections before building a strong and solid foundation in the relationship.
Being safe in the world of social media is a choice that should not offend genuine people in the friend list at all. We have the example of Steve Boggan who discovered about the past life of his girlfriend of 12 years, Suzanne Halam, just by using the internet. It took just one hour for internet experts to find out almost every private detail of this woman's life. That includes her friends, education, embarrassing pictures, former boyfriends and long-forgotten relatives.
This happened because, in common with millions of people in Britain, Suzanne was using the social networking sites Facebook and Friends Reunited, and had signed up to the business networking site LinkedIn and Flickr, the photo-sharing website. Armed with this information, criminals could have also used her identity to commit fraud or resurrect minute details of her past, her movements and friendships to lure her into scams or even dangerous liaisons. It could have been used to con her into revealing her bank details and credit card numbers.
After all, even the CEO of Google, Eric Schmidt, a man not known for worrying about internet surfers’ privacy, suggested recently that young people might want to change their identities in the future in order to separate themselves from a past lived too openly on the internet.
The relationship invite that I received was thoroughly investigated by my e-sister (I found this kiddo online). She found objectionable stuff over there and hence asked me to block it. But I realized how these criminal gangs are carefully fishing for victims online. In the past, they would have sent out thousands and thousands of spam emails in a scattergun fashion — and many still do. These are called phishing scams where you are awarded millions of $ for having used the email. Some of them invite fake requests from banks asking people to confirm their account details, passwords and so on. The hope is that, once in a while, someone would be silly enough to reply.
Fortunately, I was not silly, will never be so. A love affair over couple of days of online friendship? Oh! Give me a break. Instinctively I am now addicted with social media and professionally it has benefitted me as well. Therefore, it is no longer a matter of choice to stay connected, but the need as well. However, being less than couple of years old on the social networking sites, I am fast learning the nuances of the medium. I hope the learning curve makes me careful in selection of friends/contacts in future, benefits Track2Media Consulting in its business and goads the mass communication students in the right direction with my shared experiences.

Bihar elections and Barack Obama effect

July 16, 2006

Can Bihar, predominantly seen as one of the most underdeveloped states of India in collective consciousness replicate Barack Obama’s model? I understand the question itself will be seen as cynicism but wait. Give it a thought and there will appear some parallel in these two different poles on various given parameters of governance, development and overall human development index. My assessment, or rather I should say optimism is not based on the phenomenal and unbelievable growth rate of Bihar in times of global recession. Of course, the GDP projection of 11 per cent by an eminent economist and 16.5 per cent by the Central Statistics office would definitely be a cause of envy even to the world’s super power in America.
However, my above assumption is not based on the reports of Bihar revival by the now unquestionable turnaround man in the Chief Minster Nitish Kumar. What has actually surprised me is the sheer presence of the state, its governance and its politics on social networking sites like the Facebook and Twitter. When the Economist magazine analyzed how politicians around the world from Venezuela to Japan and from Greece to Chile are using social media tools to get out their messages to constituents and voters, they had actually no idea about the penetration of the medium further deep.
Considering that LinkedIn was established in 2003, Facebook in 2004 and Twitter in 2006, it no doubt seems to be a fast forward march by the politicians of the state. With some of them without any background in the formal university level education, it is all the more surprising that they are adapting and accelerating quicker and faster medium for political dialogue.
In a way it spells good for democratic institutions in Bihar where wide engagement combines with open sharing of information. It is clearly an issue, as social recommendation becomes bigger the challenge is to engage individuals deeply enough that they will escalate from passive viewer to active participant. Most of the Bihar centric discussion revolves around the performance of Nitish Kumar government and the forthcoming elections. By extension this also applies to those who aim to unseat him.
My Facebook wall is generally full of heated discussions on Bihar elections nowadays. What seems to be the result of the vocal nature of Biharis in general and educated and migrated non resident Biharis in particular is actually more than what meets the eyes. It is not that only the educated Biharis who have migrated to metropolitan cities for a decent living are the ones who are demand drivers of Bihar debate. The young lot in the state with limited access to electricity and even lesser access to internet are as much active on these sites as their non resident counterparts. 
The question as to why development in the backdrop of politics and elections are the only issues to be discussed automatically comes into the mind. Perhaps the answer lies in the restlessness of the youth in the state, which had for around a couple of decades been clueless, have suddenly found a medium to air their grievances. Many politicians from the state too have sensed this transformation and want the first-movers-advantage in the cyber space networking.
The moot point here is that whether it is a natural progression of the state into technology zone or the political parties have taken this first-movers-advantage a bit too seriously. On the basis of Facebook and Twitter discussion Prima Facie it seems a carefully crafted social media campaign has been launched by at least two parties (JD (U) and BJP) in power, with Congress social media campaign racing up along the charisma of Rahul Gandhi, while the other two players (RJD and LJP) seem to be clueless as to what is this hype all about.
My assumption, however, proved to be wrong when some more searches found the presence of even Laloo yadav and Ramvilas Paswan on the Facebook. Not only this, individual ministers and MLAs in the state with relatively less exposure to the technology and global obsession with social networking too have got their own website done, with some of them adding dynamic features. It seems everybody is omnipresent on various social networking sites; even the illiterate ones too have social media managers for shadow boxing.
Easy to dismiss, but less easy to master; the mantra of social media is perhaps yet to come of age in Bihar politics. But its growing influence and ubiquity, particularly among younger voters, cannot be ignored. The complications of this new reality are that 18- to 24-year-olds are not prepared to consume political messages passively. The catalysts to this transformation have been the mainstream media that are largely into the mode of broadcast and not conversation.
The 2010 Bihar campaign can prove to be India’s first true social media electoral cycle, if the momentum picks up and reflects some tangible vote swing. Whether the JD (U) uses these tools to their maximum advantage or whether the BJP or Congress figure out how to employ social media to explain incumbent policies and rally their base will be analyzed in-depth following the November elections. It may not prove to be India’s first true internet campaign, won and lost Obama-style, Bihar elections nonetheless have a distinct Barack Obama effect this time around. 

Socia Marketing loses relevance with over dose

An advertising campaign of a telecom company that shows a stripey orphaned tiger cub running for cover urges people to “Save the Tiger”. The social marketing campaign of Aircel has roped in a galaxy of sports icons to endorse the cause. The suggestion is to raise the voice, write blogs….among other things. Well, the compassionate human in me feels tempted to be a part of saving the tiger, and hence write the blog. But on second thoughts, the communication professional in me fails to connect with the cause and the brand. There is a big question mark over efficacy of the suggested methodology here and I am still groping for an answer as to how to contribute the cause constructively.

The Social Marketing has been the buzz word, of late. It is very much the same as the Digital Media & Social Networking Sites have been the handy tool for the PR pros during the last few years. I have earlier written as to how over reliance on social media only reflects strategic PR dilemma http://track2media.blogspot.com/2009/07/over-reliance-on-social-media-reflects.html. However, very much like the Digital media getting over crowded and messages directionless in the PR world, the Social Marketing in advertising is getting vague, directionless and often offers no solution to the questions raised.

Nearly all the Social Marketing campaigns that have hit the newspapers, TV Spots and Billboards have started with a question and have failed to answer it conclusively. Advertising agencies focusing on Social Marketing should probably take a leaf out of Jaago Re campaign of Tata Tea which advocates about compulsory voting. No wonder, the campaign saw 28 lakh registrations on their website.

Even though I deplore voting in a political set-up where Right to Recall the elected representative is non-existent, I feel an emotional connect with the campaign. However, their next campaign that talked about corruption (Khilana Bandh Peelana Shuru) clearly showed conceptual fatigue and had no answer as to how to check the menace of corruption in a society where an honest man and not corrupt one is a liability.

This fine brand and message connect is quite evident in the Amir Khan endorsed Atithi Devo Bhava (Guest is God). It has all the necessary ingredients of a successful Social Marketing campaign-an emotional connect; promoting tourism as a brand and involvement of the TG, that is common man on the streets, while the pre requisite of a moral high ground in such a campaign has also been maintained.

However, there are other campaigns like What An Idea Sirji, where campaign takes off in a Caste Conundrum, changes track mid way amidst criticism and then goes directionless with its Save Paper message. It seems advertisers had no idea as to whether message should be kept at the fore front or the persona of film star as its brand ambassador. While the first message didn’t offer any solution, the second one is a copy & paste solution of successful global campaign of an IT company.

The petrol conservation campaign of PCRA where a school going son tells his father not to keep the car running at red light is more of a brand trying to connect to the TG through children as influencers. The statement of the child that he will open a bicycle repair shop in future may be seen as a threat by a section and is not something that will go down well with the sensibilities in the Indian cultural context. The element of moral high ground, which ideally should flow into two-way channel, is only through the perspective of the advertiser here. Most important, it does not offer a viable solution. In my opinion, such a campaign would have evoked more response if targeted around an option like Car Pool.

An ideal Social Marketing campaign is one that takes the Brand Positioning to a moral high ground, offers a solution to the core of the problem and not just holding a candle to the cause, blends well with the cultural context of the given market and connects instantly with the TG. Unfortunately, Save Tiger campaign fails on these parameters. Even though I whole heartedly support the cause, the brand connect feels like being thrust upon and solution is nothing more than holding a candle to the cause.

My worry, however, is more with the emerging trend in advertising where there is an over dose of Social Marketing campaigns. While the corporates need to introspect with the brand positioning through Social Marketing, advertising will do no harm to their reputation if they offer a judicious use of such campaigns. This evolving genre of advertising is applicable only when the Brand, Message, TG and a legitimate cause blend into perfection. Failing this Social Marketing will not only lose its cutting edge but relevance as well.

Social networking or online obsession

“500 plus friends online….the person must be the loneliest creature on the planet”, said a journalist friend on the trend to be open networker and befriending those with whom one has never even met. A very private person and open critic of sharing personal and professional life with unknown people online, he was out rightly dismissing the idea of social and professional networking online. Well, I must admit that the argument has its merit even though I am myself glued to online communities for a large part of my personal and professional hours.
In an honest confession, I must admit that the networking forum like LinkedIn, Facebook and Twitter plays an influential role in my own social/networking life. I may pretend that I remain absolutely committed on a professional level, but the fact of the matter is that networking sites for me has happened like a deal with an open community. In my otherwise personal and professional life I have maintained a very strict admittance criteria for close friends and family only.
However, Facebook provides me a forum for trivial news share that I am always not very comfortable to discuss in an open forum. LinkedIn and Twitter has further helped me segregate such trivia from the more academic business exchanges I have contributed to, and profited from. Still the argument of my critic friend has forced me to introspect deep. Why??? May be because my growing sense of consciousness, backed by a few social research, has been telling me that the quality of relationships may actually be falling victim to the new-age networking tools.
Without knowing it, or at least without any conscious design, social media has also transmitted loneliness and a sense of social disconnection. In recent years, virtual escapism has effected change in numerous social groups and has given birth to new streams of revenue. Technology has drawn us into our interconnected webs, in the office, on the street, on the park bench, to the point that we exist virtually everywhere except in the physical world.
The quality time spent with friends and peer professionals is gradually getting less and we are subconsciously becoming a victim of internet obsession. Internet and its online communities are by its clinical nature cutting down the more fallible nature of human discourse: emotion, innuendo, political sniping. It lends a more objective, less risk-laden and therefore, I suppose, innocuous form of discussion. It's an ideal channel for those wishing to avoid the intricacies of complex humanity and family ties.
Relationships, both personal and professional, are hard work. Just because someone retweeted your post doesn’t mean you have a workable relationship with that follower. In order to nurture and sustain a viable connection with someone, you must have personal contact that not only reinforces what you are doing but who you are as a person and a professional. Social Media removes you from personal interaction with other people subsequently reinforcing social ineptitude.
Being a student of Freudian school of human emotions, I have always been interested in human presence and reaction and know from experience that reading faces, listening to tone beyond words and pure personal chemistry form the most powerful basis for collaborative and gratifying relationships. I must admit that such a holistic dialogue process cannot be sustained by networking sites alone.
The realization grew deeper in me be the mere phone call of a close friend, whom I have not seen for a long while. An admittedly internet addict in me suddenly felt an emotional chord by the vocal conversation and it gave me the realization of how much I value human interaction; and more importantly, of how much of it was moving away as our collective addiction to online community intensified.
While the online community is, and will remain an important aspect of today’s global networking, I have taken a conscious decision that I will never escape my nature. I'm a humanist, a communicator. Words, expression, nuance have always been the make-up of my character as well as the tools of my trade. Some where the modern day communication had created a widening gap between the conscious and subconscious mind, and it was the physical presence of a journalist friend, a one-to-one discussion that goaded me to bridge this ever widening gap.
I do hope that my peer group who swear by the online reputation management will not consider my conscious decision as an indictment of my proclaimed aptitude thus far. After all, I am not shutting down all the modern day dialogue channels, just trying to be more social on the parameters other than the social media.